Guest House
Dear Member of The Waldorf School of Santa Barbara Community,
Here at The Waldorf School of Santa Barbara we work to nurture the Un-Anxious Generation.
If children receive love from adults—at school and at home—who make time for them; if children experience a wholesome, rigorous but age-appropriate education that engages the fullness of their humanity; if children are not over exposed to technology, sensory stimuli, and adult concerns; if children learn the importance of service to others, community, and the world; and if children feel some sense of held-ness (by God or Mother Nature or what Rudolf Steiner called “the Divine”), then children—we believe—are more likely to be healthy of mind and body and not needlessly suffering.
But to be the Un-Anxious Generation doesn’t exactly mean (paradoxically!) that the children will be un-anxious.
It means, according to writer and social thinker Tracy Dennis-Tiwary, that children will know how to respond to anxiety when it comes (and it will!).
In the podcast “Understanding Anxiety—and its Surprising Upside,” therapist (and Santa Barbara local) Jonathan Bastian talks with Tracy Dennis-Tiwary, professor of psychology and neuroscience and director of the Emotion Regulation Lab at Hunter College, about the anxiety epidemic and her book Future Tense; Why Anxiety Is Good for You (Even Though It Feels Bad).
In the podcast Dennis-Tiwary shares many insights about how parents might respond to anxiety in children. Dennis-Tiwary holds that we now as a society detrimentally equate mental health with the absence of psychological discomfort. This trend, she believes, is destructive. She holds that we are weighed down by an unconscious fidelity to a “toxic positivity.”
“Anxiety is a feature of being human,” Dennis-Tiwary says. “It’s not a bug; it's not a malfunction. We can learn and work through it.”
Dennis-Tiwary also holds that parents (out of understandable concern) can err on the side of being over-accommodating when their children are anxious, becoming “snowplow” parents that remove all obstacles in the way of the child’s happiness. This tendency can undermine, she argues, the development of emotional grit. “If we never allow our children to struggle with negative emotions, to feel bad sometimes, they will not gain the skills to learn how to feel good.”
Dennis-Tiwary says there are skillful ways to respond to anxiety but emphasizes that “mental health is not the absence of emotional discomfort.” “Whosoever has learned to be anxious in the right way,” Dennis-Tiwary says, quoting Soren Kierkegaard, “has learned the ultimate.”
Should you have the interest, consider listening to the podcast. It might be helpful as we seek to create a healthy community worthy of these beautiful children.
Understanding anxiety —and its surprising upside | Life Examined | KCRW
Important Dates:
Wednesday, March 19th at 5:30 p.m.: Spring Performance
Thursday, March 20th: Last Day of Winter Term
Friday, March 21st-Friday, March 28th: Spring Break
Monday, March 31st: First Day of Spring Term
With heart,
The Admin Team
PS The Poem of the Day is by Rumi (translated by Coleman Barks):
Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
Thank you for supporting WSSB. Half of our families have already donated to this year’s Annual Campaign. Please help us reach our goal of 100% participation. No gift is too small! No gift is too large!
